Week 31: The One Where Desire is Enough and I'm Sorry for Two Emails

 So my title is from having D Todd Christoferson come to our mission and talk to us. (He is one of the big buys in the church) And so one of his counselors with him shared how missions are HARD and a lot of times he found himself coming up short to things, and not accomplishing things the way he wished he could and he would beat himself up and be really stressed out. And then he explained how he wished he knew back then as a young missionary that the desire was enough. He bore his testimony on how in the world success is measured by how much you achieve or do and how in heaven success is measured by just your desire, what you wanted in life and your intention. Because there is so much we can’t control and so many times we fail, Heckkk that's what we do best as humans is fail. But just that desire is enough, that's what matters. And then he went on a tangent on how we never have a RIGHT to assume or judge or think ourselves better then another and I could go on and ONNN about how much I love and agree about that topic but you guys don’t need to read a book lol. But after this four hour meeting with all 200 plus missionaries in the Utah Provo Mission there we went and had dinner, did a film, wrote some emails asking people to help our friends and their lives out and are now crashing and getting ready for a lot of meetings on our Sunday tomorrow.

Elder Coleman from Kennewick lol 

also why do I low-key look cross-eyed in this photo. OHWELLLL 

Also Schmid keeps having random weirdly accurate dreams about my family so that's been entertaining. 

 all I want at the end of life is to be dancing under the moon with the love of my life

This was something that made me and Schmids whole week…. Every monday Mapleton has a park concert night thingy where the fire department puts on a BBQ and a band comes and plays in the park and a bunch of people have booths where they are selling homemade stuff. Its so beautiful. And all the old people sit in the front row and tap their feet, but there is this one old couple that dances in this gazebo right next to the band playing and they just dance all night. It was the sweetest thing and made my heart hurt a little lol.

cute dog pics ofc ofc.

Anyways on a less fun note I am taking meds for my face acne (RIP) and so I didn't know this but you're not suppose to take it right before bed, you have to take it and then be upright for 30 plus minutes, so me ofc takes it right before bed and then goes to sleep and I could tell i didn't really swallow it all the way but I was in bed already and didn’t care enough to get out and drink more water. So two days later it still feels like I have it in my chest and it's hurting more and more to swallow water or food so I called Nurse Nelson and she happened to be with Dr. Heaston and they were just like Sister Chan did this even though she knew she wasn’t supposed to and I was just like “ummmm, ya, no not really.” Basically tho I just have to get TUMS, which i think are straight NASTY and also drink coconut oil which is weird feeling, drink more water and make sure its ice even tho chinese people say ice water is bad for you. SO basically I am going against my own culture. Im jk. But yeah I just love that my chest is hurting all the time now and my ankle still swells up really easily lol. No but I really am so thankful for my body and all that it does for me:))

schmid getting visions from above. jk she's just getting an eyelash lift. 

It's been a crazy week and I can’t believe that tomorrow is Friday. I don’t even wanna talk about how fast time is going with Schmid, it's not cool and I feel like it's only been a week together but it's almost been four. So not cool. Anyways I got a new lens for my camera, shoutout to all the peeps that helped make that happen lol you are the G. 

bet ya didn't see that coming 

My bffs right now and kids that I literally look up to and want to be like one day are, Paxton he is SO SICK and is 11, he owns three guitars and doesn't know how to play so we are gonna change that real quick lol. We had a bomb lesson with him and his friend named Kowen and afterwards Paxton and Kowen really wanted to show me their bike route/jump park in the backyard and they are all doing the loop and making it look like a piece of cake and they finish and then go “okay Chan your turn.” So I’m like not one to say no to a challenge, anyone who knows me knows that. So I hop on the bike and get speed and I hear them behind me go um that's a little fast and without thinking I go off the jump and out of nowhere comes this log and I swerve out of the way so I dont hit it ALMOST eat dirt catch myself and then OOOPP there's a freaking ANOTHER jump right after that so go off that somehow land it and then cycle back to Paxton and Kowen and both of their eyes are just wide and they go “bro you just almost died” and then I hear “Schmid yell WHAT THE HELL CHAN'' and I hop off the bike and we all just start dying laughing. SO yeah good times lol. 

Jacey and her two brothers are 9,14 and 11 I think. But they are the most mature, take care of themselves, make their own schedule, independent and strong willed kids i have ever met. The oldest brother acts like he is their dad and Jacey is a little nine year old that runs the world and he little brother is oh so patient and I can tell he is the peacemaker. We don’t know much about their life but there is a reason they take care of themselves and each other so well and it's pretty sad. Like I love them and think they are the coolest kids and I would love for my kids to be like that but I know they are only like that because they have to be because their parents aren’t. I seriously love them like they are my own baby cousins or something and just want to give them anything and everything they want or need. They all want to be baptized too we are just trying to find a day that works.

Melissa has strokes and a pretty hard life so we just help her around the house and yard a lot. 

Eli wants to be baptized, we just need to find a time.

And a lot of other teaching opportunities we just need to find the time.:))

Social Media is going SOOO good. We did a film with Rachel Cosby this week and I love that girl so much her faith and testimony is so real and bright and I loved being able to hear her journey and can’t wait to start posting all the stuff we are creating!! It’s so exciting!!:)) 

also shoutout to Nicole I can't believe it was a year ago today that we were in Cali sunburning ourselves on the beach and laughing until three in the morning while getting lost in the Cali streets walking home from downtown Disney. And getting home to your grandma making us homemade cinnamon rolls. 

MISS U ALL SO MUCH BUT HOPE YOU ARE SMILING AND HAPPY WITH TODAY! if not go on a walk, take some deep breaths and makes someone else smile. I promise it will help. (and like in all seriousness tho if you are struggling sont ever be afraid to ask for help.)  especially in prayer! love you all.

Luv. M.